Revision #94

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Age: 19
Occupation: College Student
Whereabouts: Nowhere, Illinois (roughly around the middle)

What's Up

Whaaa...?

1. First of all, unrelated to the topic, I have to say Vanilla Coke is the worst travesty committed by my favorite corporation since New Coke. Also, how freakin' hard is it to make Lemon Coke? They have Lemon Pepsi. They have Lemon Diet Pepsi. They have Lemon Diet Coke. What's the next logical step?

http://www.bevnet.com/news/images/2004/252-LOREScanwithshad_d.jpg

Stop toying with me, you fiends! God knows I'm anal enough as it is!

2. Second, Dr. Atkins is full of it, and now he's dead.

3. Third, IT'S CALLED DIET COKE. IT HAS 1 CALORIE. IT IS A SMASH SUCCESS. IF YOU THINK YOU NEED SOMETHING LESS FATTENING THAN DIET COKE, I SUGGEST YOU WASH DOWN YOUR ZIPLOC BAG FULL OF AIR WITH A TALL GLASS OF WATER.

4. And finally, "C2." Not only stupid, but it hearkens painfully back to Coke 2, which somehow failed to find a market.

There's no creative conclusion to this rant, just a painful whimper. People seem to be unable to discern between passing fad and societal trend anymore. For instance,

FAD: Beanie Babies
TREND: the Internet
FAD: those stupid virtual pet things
TREND: cellular phones
FAD: Dr. Atkins and his asenine diet
TREND: eating bread

I believe mankind will be united behind carbohydrates in the new millenium, or will simultaneously suffer a massive coronary thrombosis at the collective age of 37.